Kalmax

OK, so GET THIS...

I'm reading through some of the bazillion
emails I get every week, and I come across one of
the best emails that I've read in a LONG time.

Are you ready for the interesting part?

It's from a MARRIED GUY.

Yep, you read that right. He's married.

He reads the newsletters and uses the things he
learns to improve his marriage. Go figure.

This guy was able to explain in a few
paragraphs a concept and technique that I
personally use, but have been unable to actually
explain and verbalize well.

I wish I would have written what you're about
to read, but I didn't (But I'm still a cool guy
because I wrote what came before and after it).

Check this out...


***Conversation Technique***

Dave,

I'm still having great success with a rekindled
marriage using you're Tips on my wife. Thanks a
million. Listen, I keep reading over and over in
the MailBags guys wanting to know how to start,
then keep a conversation going with women. I work
for a major oil company and have been through many
of there training courses on dealing with people.
One particularly interesting course was on
"Information Seeking". For this we first practiced
picking up on "Key words or phrases" the subject
said. For instance, I'll try and give an example
using c&f even though you wouldn't use this
professionally on the job. Lets say you see this
great looking chick on the street and you tell her,
"That's an unusual looking dress you're wearing.
Was that made out of a shower curtain?" She says,
"Your mean! No, I bought this from the Old Navy
store." Key Words: Old Navy. "Oh, so you're in the
Navy, huh?" "No silly. You know, the big store over
at the Mall." Key word: Mall. "Oh, so you like
going to the Mall and buying strange looking
dresses do you? Do your girlfriends buy them
also?" "My girlfriends are neat dressers and my
dress is very popular I'll have you know!" Key
phrases: "girlfriends are neat dressers" and "dress
is popular". "Well, if your girlfriends are neat
dressers in a popular dress like you're wearing
then I'm going into the shower curtain clothing
business..." I know, this is a lame example but
the lessons are this.

1) You start a conversation with however you want
then pick out key words or phrases from what the
person says.

2) You repeat them in what you say then listen for
new key words in there next response.

3) You add a little something new into the
conversation REPEATING there words you're using as
Key words or phrases. This tells them you're
listening, even though you're turning things
around to be c/f in this situation.

Once we learned to keep someone talking for 5
minutes, then 15 minutes the company actually
hired total strangers from a job soliciting
company to come and be our subjects. While being
videotaped we had to get the person talking and
keep them talking for 30 minutes. One important
note: If a person brings up something personal or
whatever, they wouldn't have mentioned it if they
didn't want to talk about it. These are great to
Key in on. My subject mentioned she was going
through a divorce and her ex-husband was a total
jerk. I keyed in on this and it's amazing what a
total stranger will tell you once you build a
little rapport. When watching the video you pick
up on mistakes or you see something different you
could have said. You also pick up on Key words and
phases you missed. It just takes a little practice.
This is just one example of how you can start a
conversation and keep it going. Hopefully it can be
of help to you're readers.

JTM
Texas


>>>MY COMMENTS:

Awesome.

This is an EXCELLENT description of how to keep
a conversation going, keep it interesting and
unpredictable, and talk about ANYTHING and have it
be fun.

Read it again.

Now let me sprinkle a little magic dust on
this, and tell you how I use this technique
personally.

When I'm having a conversation with a woman,
I'm not just listening for ANY key word... I'm
listening for a particular KIND of key word (or
words).

I'm always on the alert for any words or
phrases that can be twisted, turned around,
misinterpreted, and misconstrued (is that a word?)
in one of a few particular ways...

...namely in a way that says she stupid, ditzy,
sexually crazed, or acting suspicious.

For instance, in your example above you
suggested the following:

"That's an unusual looking dress you're wearing.
Was that made out of a shower curtain?" She says,
" Your mean! No, I bought this from the Old Navy
store." Key Words: Old Navy. "Oh, so you're in the
Navy, huh?" "No silly. You know, the big store
over at the Mall." Key word: Mall. "Oh, so you like
going to the Mall and buying strange looking dresses
do you? Do your girlfriends buy them also?" "My
girlfriends are neat dressers and my dress is very
popular I'll have you know!" Key phrases:
"girlfriends are neat dressers" and "dress is
popular". "Well, if your girlfriends are neat
dressers in a popular dress like you're wearing then
I'm going into the shower curtain clothing
business..."

Good. Nice one.

Now, let's dial it up a little bit...

She says "No, I bought this from the Old Navy
store..."

Instead of just keying into "Navy" and saying
"Oh, so you're in the navy, huh?", why not take it
to the next step and actually MAKE FUN of her.

"Oh, so is this what guys used to wear in the
Navy a long time ago... in the OLD Navy?"

Now you're BUSTING on her as well, AND it's
funny.

She says "No silly. you know, the big store
over at the Mall."

You might try "What kind of MALL are YOU
shopping at? And do your girlfriends buy dresses
like that one too?"

Again, you're hinting that she has funky taste
and she shops in weird places.

She says "My girlfriends are neat dressers and
my dress is very popular I'll have you know!"

You could go with "Oh, you have girlfriends?
You have more than one? Do they all know that you
think of them as a girlfriend? Or is one of them
the special one? By the way, if you have cute
girlfriends, then I think you and I are going to
get along VERY well."

...are you with me here?

What I'm doing is NOT ONLY looking for key
words to latch onto, but I'm ALSO looking for ways
to spin them to make fun, tease, and subtly
suggest various kinds of "racy" topics.

When done in a funny way, it's magic.

Once upon a time, a guy I know very well went
into a nightclub.

He was talking to a girl at that club for
awhile, when she said "Well, I'm getting tired. I
think it's time for me to go home."

The guy answered "Go HOME?! I just met you.
I'm not going HOME with you!"

She said "No, I mean I'M going home. I'm
tired."

He shot back "Maybe you don't hear me. I'm not
going home with you, so don't even ask anymore."

She said "No, that's not what I'm saying..."

He replied "And besides, I'm sure my place is
nicer than yours... so if anything, you're coming
home with ME."

This went on and on for about an hour or so.

And you guessed it, she went home with him.

I saw it happen with my own two eyes.

Another off-the-wall (but pretty funny) example
of this, is a story that a good friend of mine
told me about one of his friends.

His friend was talking to a girl at a club, and
she was talking about what kinds of things she
enjoyed doing with her spare time.

She said "...I like to go clubbing..."

He came back with "Oh, like baby seals?"

lol... Now, that might not get a girl to come
home with you, but it's damn funny. Love it.

This technique is GREAT for keeping a
conversation fresh, fun, unpredictable, and FUNNY
(if you know how to do it just right).

Use it.

Right now you're probably thinking to yourself:

"Wow, that's really great. I sure wish there
was a resource available that could show me
hundreds of great ideas like that... so I could
know exactly what to do from when I first meet a
woman to the first date... all the way up until
we get physical and beyond..."

Guess what?

It's right here:

http://DoubleYourDatingInfo.com/e/10156/AdvancedSeries/

...and it's absolutely JAM PACKED with so many
great, interesting, and useful ideas for meeting
and dating more women, you'll be shaking your head
when you're listening to it. Guaranteed.

...and if you haven't downloaded your copy of
my online eBook "Double Your Dating", then maybe I
haven't mentioned it enough times. You can
download it and be reading it in literally MINUTES
from right now. Go get it:

http://DoubleYourDatingInfo.com/e/10156/eBook/

I'll talk to you again soon!

Your Friend,

Jude

In the interest of world peace I would like you to look at some o fthese issues that agreat man wrote, a man we all believe should be President

Dear Jude,
Tonight, President Bush will speak to the nation about the situation in Iraq. It's about time.
I hope tonight he'll address his words not just to us, and certainly not to Karl Rove or Donald Rumsfeld, but to a young American soldier in Iraq right now -- the soldier carrying an M-16 in a dangerous place where he or she can't tell friend from foe, the marine out on patrol at night who doesn't know what's coming around the next bend. America's brave young men and women deserve to hear the truth.
For too long, the Bush administration's strategy has been to divide not unite, to spin not to lead, to attack their political enemies at home rather than fight America's enemies attacking our troops in Iraq.
It's long past time to get it right in Iraq. The administration's current lack of a coherent strategy is courting disaster instead of doing what's needed for success.
That's what we need from this administration. No more false rosy scenarios. No more happy talk about the Iraq insurgency being in "its final throes" when our military leadership knows that's just spin.
It was with our troops in mind that I offered up a plan for Iraq in a New York Times op-ed this morning. I wrote: "The reality is the Bush administration's choices have made Iraq into what it wasn't before the war -- a breeding ground for jihadists."
As I said in the article and I will say again on the Senate floor today, there's no time to wait -- this is a time for humility from the White House, and a time to take specific steps to finally get it right in Iraq. It starts by telling the truth, and being straight with Americans.
Here's what I think President Bush needs to address tonight - and we need to hold him accountable:
The president must announce immediately that the United States will not have a permanent military presence or bases in Iraq.
The United States must also insist that the Iraqis establish a truly inclusive political process and meet the deadlines for finishing the constitution and holding elections in December.
We need to put the training of Iraqi troops on a true six month wartime footing and ensure that the Iraqi government has the budget needed to deploy them.
The administration needs to work not just at security but at reconstruction -- Iraqis need to see the electricity working and the water flowing.
The administration needs to get Iraq's neighbors off the sidelines -- they can't afford a failed Iraq on their doorstep, and Bush-style unilateralism needs to bend to getting these countries on board.
And the administration must immediately draw up a detailed plan with clear milestones for the transfer of military and police responsibilities to Iraqis after the December elections. The plan should be shared with Congress.
It's the only way we can set the stage for American forces to begin to come home.
The next months are critical to the future of Iraq and our security. If the administration fails to take the kind of steps I outlined today, we will stumble along, our troops at greater risk, casualties rising, costs rising, the patience of the American people wearing thin, and the specter of quagmire staring us in the face.
I urge you to watch the president's speech tonight with a careful eye and to act in every way possible to demand what our troops deserve - leadership equal to their sacrifices.

Sincerely,

John Kerry

To answer your second question first, just STOPTALKING ABOUT being a wrestler and martial artist. This reminds me of the construction worker who goes to the doctor and says "Doc, every time I hitmy finger with the hammer it really hurts. Whatshould I do?” STOP IT. Duh. OK, now let's talk about your INTERESTINGquestion. Well you asked for it. Your question was "How can I get close to herif she is being cautious...?” Based on what you've told me in your emailhere, I'd say that maybe you should use yourwrestling and martial arts skills to BEAT HER UP alittle. Dude, what are you TALKING ABOUT? lol... By the way, I'm joking about beating her up. Idon't usually tell people that I'm joking aboutthings, but in this case you sound so dense that Ihave to. Before I give you any more public verbal abuse,let me tell you something... I'm doing this for your own good. You need it. Back to the verbal abuse... There is something that you're OBVIOUSLY notseeing here. It's right in front of your face, but you'remissing it. In fact, there are TWO very important issuesthat we need to deal with. Let's talk about the MOST OBVIOUS one first: YOU'RE IN LOVE WITH DAMAGED GOODS... AND YOUCAN'T SEE IT. Unfortunately, this is the GOOD news. The BAD news is that you must have some majorissues if this is the kind of woman that interestsyou. As you can probably tell already, this isn'tthe kind of thing that I usually discuss in mynewsletters... but I feel that this particulardiscussion is going to help a lot of guys... sohere goes. I know, I know... You're a "good guy". You want to rescue her from the jerk, and showher how well you can treat her. You think that if you could just have thechance to TELL HER how you FEEL ABOUT HER thatshe'd see the light, and come running to yourarms... and you'd be able to give her everythingshe's always wanted in a man. You want to be the one that leads her tounderstand that she DESERVES BETTER, and she canhave it if she chooses you. I feel ya, dog. By the way, the only reason I know thisparticular situation so well is that I've LIVED ITa few too many times. It's ironic, but you're actually LUCKY thatthis particular girl isn't interested in you. You have no idea how much grief she's savingyou by not being interested. OK, back to the point... Let's talk. Just you and me. Like friends. WHAT ARE YOU THINKING, MAN? It's always amazing to me how a guy will passup a dozen opportunities a day to walk over andmeet attractive women... but they'll spend days,weeks, months, or even YEARS trying to get theattention of a woman who isn't interested or isn'tWORTH it. It's great being human, isn't it? So why is this? Why do us guys do this to ourselves? What's up? I mean, maybe this girl reminds you of yourmom. I don't think I want to go there. Whatever it is, you really need to wake up andsmell reality. The last thing you want is a woman who is anABUSE MAGNET. I don't care what you say, or how nice youthink she is... the reality of this situation isthat you're hung up on a girl who needs more helpthan you can offer her. And again, the WORST part of this situation isthat you don't realize what this whole situationis saying about YOU. You're basically admitting that you are:1) Attracted to the wrong kinds of women.2) Blind.3) Obsessive. (By the way, so am I, so don't feel too bad.) So, what can a guy DO about a situation likethis one? Well, here are a few ideas:1) Forget this particular girl. She's probably notinterested in you to begin with, and even if shewas, she's likely to break your heart and dump youfor an abusive jerk (again) anyways.2) Take a look at yourself, and figure out whatyou REALLY want. If you want abuse, neglect, andpain, hire a dominatrix. Less heartache.3) Stop being so damn NICE. There's an incrediblelesson here, but you're not seeing it. Guess whythis girl chose the jerk over you? Hint: It wasNOT because he was chasing her around andobsessing over her. It was because she feltATTRACTION for him. He triggered something insideof her that is MORE POWERFUL than REASON. You needto learn how to do THAT, my man. So let's have a little talk about ATTRACTION. I get a lot of email from guys who just don't"get it" when it comes to women and dating. It all usually starts with one simpleproblem... ATTRACTION ISN'T A CHOICE... but men act likeit is. Women don't CHOOSE who they feel attracted to,just like men don't CHOOSE who they feel attractedto. It just happens. BAM! All at once. And it happens for a bunch of reasons thatdon't make a whole lot of "logical" sense, whenyou first look at them. And, MORE IMPORTANTLY, if you don't know whatmakes women feel that powerful instant emotionaland physical ATTRACTION for a man... and how totrigger it... then you're going to be out of luck. If you don't "GET IT", then nothing will workvery well for you. You'll be chasing women around for the rest ofyour life, trying to figure out why they aren'tinterested in a "nice" guy like you. On the OTHER hand, if you DO get it... and youlearn how and why women feel ATTRACTION, then justabout ANYTHING you do can work. There are a few key steps to learning how to besuccessful with women and dating, and you need tolearn them. For you, step one is to stop chasing crazywomen who like abuse. Step two is to go order my Advanced DatingTechniques program. One of the things you'll notice is that guysare constantly writing in to comment that thisprogram helped them "get it" and to see things ina different way... and THAT is what led to theirnew success. I'm telling you, us guys got some BAD, badprogramming... and we need a new way of looking atthings. By the way, in addition to taking you behindthe scenes of female psychology, my program willalso teach you literally HUNDREDS of specifictechniques for everything from overcoming yourfear of approaching women, meeting women online,taking things to a "physical" level, andeverything in between. I'll talk to you again soon.
Your Friend,
Jude

This week I would like to turn the tables
around and try something a little bit different.

Something that just might make you take a new
perspective and think about things in a way you've
never thought about them before... something that
just might stir you up enough to get you to take
some ACTION...

First, I'd like you to think about the last
time you saw a really attractive woman, you wanted
to go over and talk to her, but for whatever
reason you just didn't do it. I'm talking about a
REALLY hot one.

Take your time if you need it. I'm not going
anywhere.

Good.

Now, let me ask you something:

Did you ever stop a day or two after one of
these situations happened to think about where
that particular woman might be, and what she might
be doing?

Did you ever stop to think about what the rest
of her day was like after she walked by you?

About the ten or twenty other men that saw her
that day who didn't have the nerve to talk to
her... and the two or three that did...?

About the most-likely BORING job that she went
to, the same-old-same-old "Wow, you're beautiful"
lines that she heard from the guys who got up the
nerve to talk to her?

Did you ever consider that it might be useful
to take a little time out and consider what it
might be like to be an attractive woman, walking
through life having almost every man you see light
up with the "Whoa" look?

Hmmm...

What do you think we might be able to figure
out if we just took a few minutes to explore what
that attractive woman's PRIVATE life is like?

Here are a few things that I've come up with:

1) Most beautiful women are BORED OUT OF THEIR
MINDS by most men. One of the reasons for this is
that guys have NO IDEA what to do when they run
into an attractive woman, so they do the same
default thing: Dumb look, compliment.

2) As I've said before, and I'm sure I'll say many
many, many times in the future: You can't BORE a
woman into feeling attracted to you. If she's most
likely got a boring life like everyone else, and
you do something that every one of the other 499
guys she's going to walk by this month did, then
you're probably not going to attract any special
attention.

3) If you just start with the idea of NOT DOING
WHAT OTHER GUYS DO, you will be WAAAAYYYY ahead of
the game.

Wow, this is fun, isn't it? Bet you never
thought you'd be thinking like a woman, did ya?

So what are a few things you might do to:

1) Not be like the other 499 boring, predictable,
"nice" loser guys she encountered.

2) Be interesting, attractive and attention-getting
in a way that makes her feel like you might
actually be someone to provide her with a pinch of
spice for her life?

I thought you'd never ask...

And, as you may have already predicted, I have
a few ideas of my own (but don't let that stop you
from thinking about this on your own as often as
you get a chance).

To start with, you'd probably want to get rid
of the "Wow, you're a beautiful woman, and I'm
just an average guy admiring you" vibe. That's not
helping.

Next, you could take a moment and think about
how a guy that she would feel ATTRACTED to might
act... then choose that style.

My experience is that if you take an attitude
of "I guess fate has good taste putting us in the
same place, now let's see if you have a
personality to match your looks", then stir in a
generous portion of Cocky and Funny, you're likely
to do well.

Here's a variation of something I've used
myself once or twice:

YOU: "Hey, can I ask you a quick question?"
[leaning back and playing it cool, talking cool
and slow]

HER: "Sure"

[pause pause pause for suspense]

YOU: "Are you single?" [stone cold straight face]

HER: "Well, um..."

YOU: "I'll take that as a yes..." [nodding, sly
smile]

HER: [Laugher]

YOU: "Well, I just happen to know someone that I
think might really like you... if you're more than
just a pretty face, that is... He's funny, has
great taste, and I think you'd like him... I'd
love to sit down and get your life story, but I'm
on my way somewhere... do you have email?" [very
cool, calm tone of voice]

HER: "Yes."

YOU: Great... [takes out pen]... write it down for
me, and I'll have, uh [clears throat] HIM send you
an email."

[Get email and wish the lady a good day.]

Now, let's talk about what just happened here.

First off, did I give her any compliments? Did
I act like the other 499 guys? Did I instantly
communicate that "I'm not worthy"?

HELL NO.

I said "Hey, can I ask you a quick question?"
in a very laid-back, almost too-relaxed and
mysterious tone of voice.

Anyone will respond to that with a "yes".

Next, I did something kind of fun: I asked her
DIRECTLY if she was single.

LOL... I really love this one. It's so fun.
Most guys will say "Uh, I'll bet you have a
boyfriend, huh?" or "So do you have a man?" or
some other lame thing.

The question "Are you single?" takes women off
guard. It's great. And then being assumptive when
she hesitated with an answer... in a cocky/funny
way... magic.

Next I followed up with a cocky, funny, semi-
confusing little bit about "knowing someone" that
might find her interesting. Now, she might think
that it's really ME, but she won't know FOR SURE
until she gets the email.

And even then you might play with her a bit...
"So, what did you think of my friend? I think he
might like you..." etc.

The point is, I can pretty much guarantee you
that this particular sequence hasn't happened to
her lately.

She's still trying to overcome her sheer awe
about how many guys in a row can ask "Don't I know
you from somewhere?"

This kind of fun approach will be a welcome
breath of fresh air.

Now, I want you to do something. Go back and
READ IT AGAIN... VERY CAREFULLY. Imagine it
happening exactly like it's written. Try to
imagine it in a few different settings. Work on it
until you can clearly see it happening in your
mind's eye. (The reason I can see it clearly is
because I've done it so many times in real life!)

OK, so now you know how to approach women.

Fantastic.

I can remember when I first learned how to
start approaching women... I thought that if I
could just start conversations easily, the rest of
it would be a snap.

Well, after meeting a lot of women, but not
getting so many dates... and not having the few
dates I did get go anywhere... I realized that
there was a lot more to it.

The reality is that success with women comes
down to understanding female psychology, knowing
the entire "mating game" front to back, and then
knowing all the specific techniques and steps you
need to take at each moment with a woman.

And there's only one place in the world I know
of that you can learn all of this information
quickly, easily, and thoroughly...

And that one place is my Advanced Dating
Techniques CD/DVD program.

In this program, I'll take you all the way
through all the things you need to know to be
successful with women... from theory to
practice... from nuts to bolts... from meeting to
dating, to "getting physical".

All of it.

You can check out some great free samples here:

http://www.DoubleYourDatingProducts.com/e/10156/AdvancedSeries/

If you haven't gotten yourself a copy of my new
Body Language DVD program... and you want to learn
how to use your body language and voice tone to
make women feel a powerful EMOTIONAL AND PHYSICAL
attraction for you, then you really need to get
it.

This is the only program of its type in the
world, and it will give you an education in Body
Language that will change how women respond to you
INSTANTLY.

All the details, plus some great preview video
clips are here:

http://www.DoubleYourDatingProducts.com/e/10156/BodyLanguage/

And if you haven't downloaded my online eBook
yet, then you really need to go and do that right
now. You can download it and literally be reading
it within a few minutes from right now. It's here:

http://www.DoubleYourDatingProducts.com/e/10156/eBook/

...and download it now. You'll be glad you did.

I'll talk to you again soon,

Your Friend
Jude

Today I turn my attention to a new thing, Our country Uganda and the stubbon and stupid Adiminisration in Kigali. I am too disappoited with the Monitor News paper articles comming in from Rwanda especially in respect with the humilation and stupid, backward way they treated the Uganda Head of state.First if any Ugandan has never commented anything on the dictatorship and Militaristic way Kagame and his boys are oppressing the people of Rwanda then we aresorry for playing Big Brother.

In any case Uganda has bigger problems to deal with like poverty eradication, and general development of our dear country other than Commeting on the democracies of minnor contries like Rwanda.

Secondly I would like to say that If the people of Uganda which include my self decided to ammend 'our' constitution to allow the President to run forever, among other countries Rwanda should Shutup,because they do not have the moral authority of even saying anything.

I would also like to let anybody who wants to say anthing about the internal democracy of Uganda to know that he/she can only comment but has to respect the feelings of the people of Uganda. We understand where we have been and where we are and where we are going and we shall decide on who best should guide us other than looking at Kagame!!! ,Rwanda a country with such a a bad track record and atleast not Kagame.

lastly let me tell the stupid adiministration in Kigali that threatening Ugandans should get out of your mind because we can also deal with you in any way posible in hours than decades you have tried to distablise us.we have the not only the capacity but also the ability and now your giving us the will to finish you.

Jude

The British Cosulates around the world and I will write about Uganda in particular are not only unfair but also irritating in the way they process the visa applications. Its imparative to understand that not all people who live in third world countries are desparate to leave their countries for one reason of sweeping streets of london and other cities of the developed world,
We at times if not most times have bussiness we need to take care of in these cities.

I have like many Ugandans have tried to get Visas from the British high commission but it seems ,to some of us you need to have some special smeal,dressed up in a certain way or having put on a particular perfume to get this thing called permission to step on British soil.

Ugandan consulates arround the world send us "vistors" in diffrent classes, what I am sure about is the fact that it does not take them the hussle we pass through for them to be in Uganda. Some of them come as fake investors who start up simple retail shops to compete with the local masses, but still we leave them here in the interest of Globle hospitality because we are one people who should have the same oppotunities in all conners of the world.

All iam asking for in this articl is for the British to understand that we are people of the world before we are rich/poor/third world or Developed.
And my other submission is the fact that its better for us all in the world to have equal oppotunities than a master servant relationship the British have always tried to silently push for.

In the interest of the world the British government needs to work on such bottlenecks to be able to avoid hatread and decent in the interest of being realy simple in my article i will leave it at that.

Jude